Saturday, May 31, 2008

Sex and the City

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Not good to watch if:

youre feeling used.
ure a hopeless romantic.
ure wondering when its going to work out for you.

Just an idea. Ive heard it from various people. HAHA.

Btw, my family = awesomeness.
Summer = great.
Work = enough said.

Oh and Im writing a song - because I think its fun. Dunno where it came from & no one will ever hear it, but I think its interesting.

And ummm, Im pretty much stoked about working in OB starting FALLLLL! Bring on the babies and mommas! Yes yes yes. Finally taking care of people (NOT as a CNA) haha!

Saturday, May 17, 2008

I Am ----->

.....

needing more guidance than I ever thought possible. I really dont know what to do or say anymore, or even how to go about saying it....or getting my point across. Truth is...sometimes I feel like I really know what God is doing in my life, and other days Im wondering what I did to be in the position Im in. I know, I know...people think that sitting on the outside looking in...things are cut and dry, black and white. But in my life, its a mess of a whirlwind...a roller coaster that goes down more often than it goes up....Really youd think I was far below sea level, fighting my way back to the top, struggling for any bit of breathe that I could get. Most of the time I feel like I just need someone to reach out, grab me and pull me up. Make me have motivation, make me see that this isnt the life I was intended for. But I guess thats a whole nother test in itself - fighting for what I believe in, what I want, and what I know is meant for my life. Some days the motivation and strength are there without asking, without being forced, but other times, Im lost and struggling and wondering how everyone else makes it look so incredibly easy. There are things I need to change, need to work on...to become the person that I want to be and know Ill become. But thats like anyones life, right? Making improvements, changes, sacrifices. All I know is what my heart tells me all day long, before I go to sleep at night, and first thing when I wake up. Its love...maybe thats the most important thing in the universe. I mean, thats pretty much what I think anyways. But love is hard, love is a struggle, love takes work. The thing is...youve gotta find that person that is worth fighting for, that the good is worth the bad, the one...the only one. Well, I suppose Im trying to say that "Im in"...count me in. Im a girl that cant help but know what I want and how I feel. Things were amazing for so long for a reason. I was blessed beyond all recognition! And well, anything important enough...is always worth fighting for. And when two people fight for each other....against all odds...whats supposed to happen, will happen. As long as things have been let go, given over to God, and all hurt has been released. A fresh start for something a long time coming... <3 Its your love, it just does something to me...

Sunday, May 11, 2008

Home For Summer

Yay. Im home & this summer is my fresh start! I know that sounds so cliche, but I get some space and some freedom away from things dragging me down. Ya know that saying "let go of what kills you and hold onto what keeps you breathing.." Well, its something like that. And I guess thats how summer is going to be. :-) Horrray. I get to see some of my fav people ever! But then again, Im leaving too many back in Eville. Ugh. So, about every other weekend, Ill be there for sure. YES! And P.S. I have some of the cutest baby cousins in this world. AdOrAbLe! But, yesterday, was the last day in my grandparents house & it was impossible & final & everything I didnt want to deal with, but handled just fine i suppose. Anyway, its over & I really dont want to see movers in there on Tuesday. No thanks. But, this week is full of new things & appointments & excitements. Hahaha. (Oh, and maybe a visit from a new friend... )

So, lets make it great...